The Power of Being Seen

Written by Danielle Foreman, Licensed Marriage & Family Therapist

Danielle Foreman, Mind & Spirit Counseling Center

As the school year continues and kids and teens are busy participating in a variety of life activities and sports, it can be a challenge to find quality time together to stay connected. Luckily parents and caregivers have the ability to reaffirm and strengthen the connection and bond with their children using praise and simply validating their child’s experiences and feelings. These small moments of recognition tap into the power of being seen, where children feel valued and understood. While these moments of connection can be very powerful, they often don’t have to be complicated.

Below are some examples of ways you can connect, validate, praise and encourage your children and teens:

  • “You have improved since your last game”
  • “You organized the toys in your room so well while you were tidying up”
  • “That was really thoughtful of you”
  • “You look really proud of yourself”
  • “Thank you for sharing your thoughts, I love hearing from you”
  • “I love spending time with you”
  • “I know that you did your best”
  • “That was really brave what you did”
  • “This family would not be the same without you”
  • “You were such a kind and caring friend when you…”
  • “I see how much effort you put into (your homework, practice, performance, friendship, etc.)”
  • “I admire your confidence”
  • “You set such a good example for others by being a team player”
  • “You are so resilient and didn’t let that (challenge, mistake, situation, etc.) stop you”
  • “Your passion about _____ amazes me”
  • “Thank you for being you”
  • “You solved that problem! It was tricky but you found a way”
  • “I love watching you do things that you enjoy”

Even taking a few minutes a day to connect with your child and teen can help them feel seen and reinforce the love and safety you provide as a caregiver and parent, which in turn can help decrease the sense of isolation and disconnection that so many are struggling with today.

A kind and encouraging word can make all the difference in any person’s day and I hope that the examples provided will inspire you to incorporate the power of being seen by briefly connecting and encouraging your children, teens, and anyone else that you might be around today.