Picture Perfect Is Only Pretend
I know someone who has a very interesting set of pictures hanging in her living room. The couplet is framed side by side and at first glance they look like identical pictures of a familiar Norman Rockwell family Thanksgiving scene. Both family portraits sport large roasted turkeys with all of the trimmings, and in both pictures mother, father, grandfather, grandmother, and children are smiling and excited as they prepare to dig in. As I said, the pictures look identical at first. But as one draws closer it becomes obvious that one picture is a fake!
Yes, the picture on the left is a familiar Norman Rockwell painting. However, the picture on the right is not a painting but a photograph. . . a photograph of this person’s entire family recreating the original Norman Rockwell painting down to the gravy bowl!
Of course it was all done in fun, but can you imagine how much work it must have been. First someone had to convince everybody that it would in fact be fun, then they had to find plates, silverware, and furniture that reasonably matched those in the painting. Finally everyone had to dress the part, pose in just the right position, then. . . snap!. . . one genuine facsimile of the real thing!
It takes a lot of work to make an entire family look like a Norman Rockwell painting, but every holiday season many of us try desperately to pull it off. . . not for fun, but for real. . . not for a moment, but for days on end. We make plans and pray that everything will go well, . . . that children will get what they want. . . that family members will get along. . . that people will not act out. . . that this year we might finally be a “real” family.
We try to get everyone together for the Christmas picture and the grandkids have ruined their new pants splashing in the mud. Dad has let the rolls burn because he wanted to catch the end of the football game. Grandmother is sad because she misses Grandpa, and Mom is worn out from cooking and cleaning and is sure she has done much more than her fair share. . . SNAP! The portrait that we hoped would look like an idealistic Norman Rockwell ends up looking more like a distorted Picasso!
There are no perfect families. All of us can benefit from a measure of patience and empathy this season. We are not responsible for everyone’s feelings and behavior in our families. Also, it is normal to feel sad sometimes during the holidays as we remember those people and things that we miss. This is especially true if we have lost someone in the past few years. Take some time to celebrate their life. Cry, laugh, and acknowledge whatever it is you are feeling. May we all be freed of the burden of having a perfect holiday season this year and in this freedom find peace and joy.
